Vulnerability is POWERFUL but you have to take off your shell

Years ago I purchased the most amazing childrens

What is going on with me today.  Why does it all feel so dead inside? LIke there is nothing there to give.  No ideas, no inspiration, just a pause i suppose.  There have been so many, many pauses.  I am not letting myself really go places at the moment.  It is as if it is trying to be of me to accomplish something rather than just doing it for the love of it and letting it come through me.  That is the problem.  

So what do I think about vulnerability? I think that we are all shaking in our boots to let people see the true us, without the mask.  Because under the mask, under the shell we are messy, imperfect, humans and we don't accept that reality.  We think that others won't either and we are afraid.  Man we are afraid of everything.  Afraid of being us afraid of not being us.  Afraid of others seeing us afraid no one will see us.  We spin and spin.  We create images of illusion and we hide behind them.  Hiding behind them long enough we begin to lose connection to who we really are, at our core without the mask.  We give ourselves away for so long that there is nothing left.  

There is part of us that knows we have something to give this world.  That we have a gift to offer but we don't even know what that is because we are so far away from it, because it is us.  It is the core.  

Many of us go through this phase in our lives often known as mid life where we experience "crisis", upheaval, where we aren't sure which way is up and which way is down, where we question everything.  For some people there are actions that come out of this period that don't really align with what we are feeling i.e. a large and dramatic purchase, quitting a job, cheating in a relationship....we seek outside rather than turning within.